I saw this on a few Friends' Facebook posts recently and am unsure as to who wrote the original post.  I've heard of this parable for many years. I remember it as "The Cherokee Legend of the Two Wolves" and have been using it in my Mind Coaching with Hypnotherapy Practise for many years.

Regardless of the who is narrating the parable, the meaning is the same.  What I believe is that whatever wolf we feed (representing the different parts of our Subconscious Mind) will grow.  Everything we focus on GROWS!  But we have choices and free will.  Which would you choose and which one ARE you choosing with your 35,000+ thoughts per day???  Listen quietly and you'll know which wolf you feed.

Which Wolf Do You Feed?      The Practice - Feed the Wolf you Love

Why? I once heard a Native American teaching story in which an elder, a grandmother, was asked what she had done to become so happy, so wise, so loved and respected. She replied: "It's because I know that there are two wolves in my heart, a wolf of love and a wolf of hate. And I know that everything depends on which one I feed each day." This story always gives me the shivers when I think of it. Who among us does not have both a wolf of love and a wolf of hate in their heart? I know I do, including the wolf of hate, which shows up in small ways as well as large ones, such when I get judgmental, irritable, pushy, or argumentative. Even if it's only inside my own mind - and sometimes it definitely leaks out. We've got these two wolves because we evolved them, because both wolves were needed to keep our ancestors alive. Until just 10,000 years ago, for millions of years primates, hominids, and early humans lived in hunter-gatherer groups that bred mainly within the band while competing intensely with other bands for scarce resources. Therefore, genes got passed on that promoted better cooperation inside a band and better aggression between bands. The wolf of love and the wolf of hate are stitched into human DNA. Bands kept their distance from each other, and when they met, they often fought. For example, researchers have found that about 12-15% of hunter-gatherer men died in conflicts between bands - compared to "just" the 1% of men who died in the many bloody wars of the 20th century. So it's natural to fear the stranger - who, back in the Stone Age with no police around, was often a lethal threat. The related impulse to dehumanize and attack "them" also worked well (in terms of passing on genes) for millions of years. Today, you can observe the wolf of hate all around us, in acts of thought, word, and deed. For example, as soon as we see others as "not my tribe," whether it's at home or work or on the evening news, the wolf of hate lifts its head and looks around for danger. And then if we feel at all threatened or mistreated or desperate, the wolf of hate jumps up and looks for someone to howl at or bite. While the wolf of hate was vital back in the Serengeti, today it breeds alienation and anger, ulcers and heart disease, and conflicts with others at home and work. And at a larger scale, with 7 billion people crowded together on this planet - when a flu mutation in Hong Kong can become a worldwide epidemic, when bank problems in Greece roil the global economy, when carbon emissions in one country heat up the whole world - when we fear or dehumanize or attack "them," it usually comes back to harm "us."   How? So what are we going to do? We can't kill the wolf of hate because hating the wolf of hate just feeds it. Instead, we need to control this wolf, and channel its fire into healthy forms of protection and assertiveness. And we need to stop feeding it with fear and anger. Meanwhile, we need to feed the wolf of love. This will make us stronger inside, more patient, and less resentful, annoyed, or aggressive. We'll stay out of needless conflicts, treat people better, and be less of a threat to others. Then we'll also be in a stronger position to get treated better by them. There are lots of ways to feed the wolf of love. We can feed it by taking in the good of everyday experiences of feeling seen, appreciated, cared about, even cherished and loved. We can feed the wolf of love by practicing compassion for ourselves and others, and by letting these experiences of compassion sink into our heart. We can feed the wolf of love by recognizing the good in other people - and then by taking in the experience of the goodness in others. Similarly, we can feed the wolf of love by sensing the goodness inside our own heart, and by letting that sense of truly being a good person - not a perfect person, but a good person - also sink in. Last, we can feed the wolf of love by seeing the good in the world, and the good in the future that we can make together - in the face of so many messages these days that are dark and despairing. We feed the wolf of love, in other words, with heart and with hope. We feed this wolf by sustaining our sense of what's good in other people, what's good in ourselves, what's already good in our world, and what could be even better in a world we can build together. We need to stay strong to do this, to hold on to what we know to be true in spite of the brain's tendency to focus on threats and losses, and in spite of the age-old manipulations of various groups that play on fear and anger - that feed the wolf of hate - to gain or hold onto wealth and power. So let's stay strong, and hold on to the good that exists all around us and inside us. Let's stay strong, and hold onto the good that can be, that we can nourish and build in this world. Let's stay strong, and hold onto each other. Let's stay strong enough to take in the good that feeds the wolf of love each day.

 

 

Everyone's heard of the Law of Attraction.  And although I agree whole heartedly, I believe that what's missing is the understanding of how the mind works. 

All thoughts and feelings are stored subconsciously.  These power our actions and habits.  So to change on the level of behaviour, it needs to happen subconsciously.  The logical mind is limited to willpower and short term memory.  If it could fix anything we wouldn't need the many healing modalities available to all of us today.

I educate clients to understand that thinking about change or thinking how to change is a useless activity unless it leads you to the beneficial actions that will actually change something!  You need to also find the vehicle that will affect change at the level of the deeper mind.  Meditation is wonderful to quiet the (here is where the relearning happens) in order to open it up for change.  Hypnosis used to coach your mind to change IS the most effective way to re-train the mind to work for you instead of against you based on your self beliefs. 

Self Hypnosis should be taught as of Grade 3 which is when we are more able to focus our attention long enough to get those positive suggestions happening subconsciously.  But it's never too late.
My Mind Coaching with Self Hypnosis workshop December 6th is full but if you are interested in learning how to use it to help yourself, send me an email at aloadoffyourmind@telus.net and I'll get you on my mailing list.  The next workshop will likely be in February, 2015.

To help you understand how the mind works, here are the Rules of the Mind:

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Rules of the Mind!

Every thought or idea causes a physical reaction

Your thoughts can affect ALL the functions of your body.  Worry triggers changes in the stomach that in time can lead to ulcers.  ANGER thoughts stimulate the adreal glands and increased adrenaline in the blood stream causes many body changes. ANXIETY and FEAR thoughts affect your pulse rate and strain blood pressure which affects the heart and lungs (think squeezing)

 What the Mind expects to happen tends to be realized

The brain and nervous system respond only to mental images.  It doesn’t matter if the image is self-induced or from the external world.  The mental image formed becomes the blueprint and the subconscious mind uses every means at its disposal to carry out the plan.  Worry is a form of programming whereby you form a picture of what you don’t want but the subconscious mind acts to fulfill the picture’s situation, so if it’s a negative one, it works to fulfill it.

Many people suffer from chronic anxiety which is simply a subconscious mental expectancy that something terrible will happen to them or to someone they love.  On the other hand, we

all know people who seem to have that “Magic touch”.  What they have is NOT a positive mental attitude but a positive mental expectancy!!!!  Another way of saying that is that we become what we think about!

 

Our physical health is largely dependent upon our mental expectancy.  Physicians recognize that if a person expects to remain sick or even die, the expected condition tends to be realized. 

 

Imagination is more powerful than knowledge when dealing with your our mind or the mind of another

Reason is easily overruled by imagination.  This is why some people blindly rush into some unreasonable act or situation (think of when you were really angry or sad and you may have let the emotion run your actions).  Violent crimes based on jealously are called “Crimes of Passion” and are caused by an overactive imagination.  The idea accompanied by strong emotion (jealousy, anger, betrayal)  or our political or religious beliefs, usually cannot be talked down with reason.  What you may have noticed is the ‘after the fact’ reasoning.  After the strong emotion is expressed, the ability to rationalize returns which may leave you feeling guilty or sad at the actions you took.

Once an idea has been accepted by the subconscious mind, it remains until it is replaced by another idea

The companion rule to this is that the longer an idea remains, the more opposition there is to replacing it with a new idea (this is why one must practise being mindful of self talk, habits and practise Self Hypnosis regularly). Once an idea has been accepted, it tends to become a fixed habit of thinking.  This is how habits are formed.  First there is the thought and the feeling and then an action that drives the thought.  For example, it’s been found that teens feel lonely when not accepted by their peers so they will attempt to join the group by mimicking their actions, such as smoking or doing drugs.  Some people believe that at critical times they have to have an alcoholic beverage to steady their nerves so that they can perform effectively. This is not a logical assumption but a subconscious response to an emotion.  The idea is there and it becomes a fixed habit of thought.  There will always be opposition to replacing it with a correct/positive idea.

Each suggestion acted upon creates less opposition to successive suggestions as long as they are congruent with the belief causing the habit

A mental habit is easier to follow the longer it lasts unbroken.  Once a habit is formed, it becomes easier to follow and more difficult to break.  On other words, once a suggestion has been accepted by your subconscious mind, it becomes easier for additional suggested to be accepted and acted upon. This works whether the habit is a positive or a negative.  The key to this is that the subconscious mind accepts that which is in harmony with the habit (habitual belief). 

To change a belief, the same rule applies.  The suggestion regarding the change must be compounded until there is no opposition to it.  When each suggestion is given, it creates less opposition to successive suggestions.  Although this takes time, the subconscious mind can relearn.

An emotionally induced symptom tends to cause organic change if it persists long enough

It’s been acknowledged by many reputable doctors  that more than 70% of human ailments are functional rather than organic.  This means that the function of an organ or other part of the body  has been disrupted by a reaction from the nervous system to negative ideas held subconsciously.  We are a mind in a body and the two cannot be separated.  Therefore, if you continue to let stress rule your life, in time, organic change must occur!

 

When dealing with the subconscious mind and its functions, the greater the conscious effort the less the subconscious response

This proves why “will power” doesn’t really exist!!  When an idea has been accepted by the subconscious mind, it remains until it’s replaced by another idea.  The subconscious mind has to accept the new idea in order for it to change!  So even when you logically realize that a habit or an action or a feeling is irrational, it can’t change it using will power.  It will fizzle out like day old coke when up against the power of the subconscious that is driving every feeling, idea and action.

 If you’ve ever had insomnia, you’ve learned the law of reverse effect.  This means that the harder you tried to sleep or quiet your mind the more difficult it became. The harder you tried to go to sleep, the more wide awake you became.  The rule is, “When dealing with the subconscious mind, take it easy’.  As your faith in your subconscious mind increases, you learn to ‘let it happen’ rather than trying to ‘force it to happen”.

 

 

 

 

 

I’m sharing my #2 favourite tip from Mahatma Gandhi. 

 

2. You are in control.

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”

What you feel and how you react to something that is always up to you. When you react to something that is said in judgement or to something that you perceive is in judgement, then you are coming from your OWN insecurities and fears.  It’s your OWN lack of self esteem that causes you to react.

Remember that what other people say and do or what you perceive they say and do is coming from their own judgements based on their experiences, their childhood programming, their own morals and values.  And you have no control over that!  You only control your OWN thoughts, feelings and actions.

And we all have free will.  We have the ability to react or ignore.  Keep in mind that if you even give something thought that’s reacting.  It’s giving away your power. 

I love the saying, “What others think of me is none of my business”.  And it’s true!!!  It's never about you but your reaction IS.

 

 

I have a number of favourite tips from Mahatma Gandhi.  So I'm sharing one today :)  It speaks to how change must begin within!!!

1. Change yourself.

“You must be the change you want to see in the world.”

“As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world – that is the myth of the atomic age – as in being able to remake ourselves.”

If you change yourself you will change your world. If you change how you think then you will change how you feel and what actions you take. And so the world around you will change. Not only because you are now viewing your environment through new lenses of thoughts and emotions but also because the change within can allow you to take action in ways you wouldn’t have – or maybe even have thought about – while stuck in your old thought patterns.

And the problem with changing your outer world without changing yourself is that you will still be you when you reach that change you have strived for. You will still have your flaws, anger, negativity, self-sabotaging tendencies etc. intact.

And so in this new situation you will still not find what you hoped for since your mind is still seeping with that negative stuff. And if you get more without having some insight into and distance from your ego it may grow more powerful. Since your ego loves to divide things, to find enemies and to create separation it may start to try to create even more problems and conflicts in your life and world.

 

 

Letting your "Greater than You Think You Are" Plan guide you in life will lead you to inspiration and self acceptance. Powerful advise, right?  And it works, as all the mindfulness Authors say.  And little ol' me believe it does as well.

But that doesn't mean you park your butt under the shade of a tree on a sunny day waiting for it to fall from that cerulean blue sky and hit you on the head. There is action required on your part.  And that involves feeling "feelings".  Emotion powers your thoughts and your intentions are attached to them like the basket is attached to the hot air balloon.  But if your head is firmly planted in the sand or floating willy nilly in the air, how will you know you are being led to follow THE Plan that is bigger than your rational mind could ever compute ?

Your part of the plan is to listen to your own innate and "older than time" guidance system...your feelings. When an opportunity presents itself whether from the outside world (someone tells you about a job opportunity; you're client cancels so you have time to run out for lunch and 'happen' to run into an old friend who you reconnect with)  or your inner world (suddenly feeling inspiration over a though that is emerging in your mind), gauge the feeling for its rightness to you. Take the time to savour the sweetness of its texture on your tongue, the fullness if its tone in your stomach, the lightness of its energy in your chest.  Be aware!!!!

Then follow that course, even if it may look to you, in the moment, or others, like a detour in the road, a sometimes crazy zig to your rational sides zag. But trust that you will zig just where you are meant to.  All the twists, turns, road blocks, trip ups, stumbles and straight lines are part if your journey on the road of your life.

 

 

 



"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage" - Anais Nin

If you reach for courage, which we all inherently have, you have the ability to create and the World becomes your classroom.

If you reach for fear, or allow it to ensnare you, you are then only a participant in your life, living in your own self imposed prison.

Take the leap!

   

 

I Woke up this morning and felt inspired to write a thought I'd gone to sleep with.........

 

To find peace you need to find oneness

To find oneness you need to forgive

To forgive you need to see yourself in everyone

When you see yourself in everyone you see everyone as One...

When you see yourself in Oneness you are in Spirit
 

And when you connect with Spirit not only do you know peace...

You find God
When you see yourself in Oneness
You are in Spirit
And when you connect with Spirit
Not only do you know peace...
You find God